Grill Em All
Ryan writes:
hows it going man? My name is Ryan and im the dude w/ the grill em all tattoo! ha, im glad you posted that on yer site, my friends and i are fans, so that made my fucking day! Anyways, i play in a metal band here in los angeles called Sumerian Axe, you may or may not be into it, but i figured i'd shoot you the link either way.
http://www.myspace.com/sumerianaxe
The Inquisitors respond:
I'm pretty sure I met Ryan like 10 years ago or something in Ohio, but I could be wrong. If so, his child-like grammar and spelling make me think that he has suffered severe head trauma since then. Anyway, if you're into beard metal, check his band out. I listened to it for a second or two, then shut it off and turned on 311.
Get Thrashed
Hey im a poser so i wont waste your time, (but who isn't a poser by your standards?). Anyways i have watched a documentary called "Get Thrashed" about 5 times since it came out a month ago, Since the best part of my day is reading your blog, i think it would be a great post if you guys did a review of this doc, and provide us with some answers to what the hell is going on in this masterpiece. If you haven't heard of it check it out, acquire it, and i promise it will contain an unlimited amount of hilarious post material. Some questions i would like answered after watching the movie....
www.getthrashed.com
1. Can you locate the actual scumbag trailer park Bobby Blitz is doing his interview from and, put a logical guess to how many meth dealers are within a 10 mile radius.....mine is 1,000
2. Dave Mustane hates Beef Stew....why?
3. How many posers did Gene Hoglan actually kill?
Whatever, I'm drunk and i think this would be cool, I love your blog, fuck you.
The Inquisitors respond:
I watched the "metal vs. hardcore" clip and confirmed that this movie is like every other music documentary: 90% old, washed up douchebags telling story after long-winded story about exaggerated versions of things that happened 20 years ago (see also, "American Hardcore"). I'm sure to them the stories are super interesting and incredibly shocking, but to the rest of us they're about as exciting as your uncle's fish stories. Basically, the thrash version of Bruce Springsteen's "Glory Days," only not nearly as good.
Retard, Morlock, or Eastern Euro? You be the judge.
Eastern Europeans: The real-life Morlocks?
Ian Spermgrinder writes:
Forgive me if you're already aware of the phenomenon of Krabathor, a band from the Czech Republic whose lyrical content would make that of the early 90s British band Cancer seem highly intellectual.
Usually when a band uses english as a second language, there's a gradual learning curve and they end up getting it more right than wrong. Not Krabathor. Each release continues to defy the listener's/reader's ears/eyes with the pure nonsensical ramblilngs that is usually the exclusive purview of Japanese Wigger Slam bands. Check em out.
The Inquisitors respond:
I have heard Krabathor, but I didn't know that they were such an Engrish factory! I hopped on their MySpace and checked them, with hilarious results:
Do the Dew
Brian shares the following inspirational image. Keep it fuckin' sick, bro!! Guttural slamming brutality crew, Pepsi chapter!!
No frills metal humor
Mark is a man of few words, and write the following concise note:
I enjoy your blog, so here are some more photos to make fun of.
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=377681046
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=301075254
The Inquisitors respond:
Sure enough, there are some doozies in here!
For being so grim and necro, he looks remarkably relaxed, even pleasant. I'm trying to figure out what's going on with his flooring: is that weird carpet, or crappy linoleum tile that's coming up at the edges? Either way, I would take a look at it before it gets worse. If there's water damage, you want to catch that as soon as possible!
And here he is out of costume. It's not a bad little back yard, although with houses on either side, I think it might end up being a little too shady and cool for my tastes. You would really only get sun back there at high noon. It seems like it would be an ideal place to grow something that thrives in shade, though, like bluebells or maybe something in the nightshade family. I love bluebells, they're so pretty! Also, the shiny red ball.
Oh come on, you're not even trying!! Back in my day, we at least got in the car and stood in front of the scariest building in town instead of just crudely photoshopping ourselves in front of something off of Google images. And what kind of a name is "Restless"? That's like using "Mildly Annoyed" or "Uncomfortable" as your black metal name!
The Inquisitors respond:
I'm pretty sure I met Ryan like 10 years ago or something in Ohio, but I could be wrong. If so, his child-like grammar and spelling make me think that he has suffered severe head trauma since then. Anyway, if you're into beard metal, check his band out. I listened to it for a second or two, then shut it off and turned on 311.
Get Thrashed
Hey im a poser so i wont waste your time, (but who isn't a poser by your standards?). Anyways i have watched a documentary called "Get Thrashed" about 5 times since it came out a month ago, Since the best part of my day is reading your blog, i think it would be a great post if you guys did a review of this doc, and provide us with some answers to what the hell is going on in this masterpiece. If you haven't heard of it check it out, acquire it, and i promise it will contain an unlimited amount of hilarious post material. Some questions i would like answered after watching the movie....
www.getthrashed.com
1. Can you locate the actual scumbag trailer park Bobby Blitz is doing his interview from and, put a logical guess to how many meth dealers are within a 10 mile radius.....mine is 1,000
2. Dave Mustane hates Beef Stew....why?
3. How many posers did Gene Hoglan actually kill?
Whatever, I'm drunk and i think this would be cool, I love your blog, fuck you.
The Inquisitors respond:
I watched the "metal vs. hardcore" clip and confirmed that this movie is like every other music documentary: 90% old, washed up douchebags telling story after long-winded story about exaggerated versions of things that happened 20 years ago (see also, "American Hardcore"). I'm sure to them the stories are super interesting and incredibly shocking, but to the rest of us they're about as exciting as your uncle's fish stories. Basically, the thrash version of Bruce Springsteen's "Glory Days," only not nearly as good.
Retard, Morlock, or Eastern Euro? You be the judge.Eastern Europeans: The real-life Morlocks?
Ian Spermgrinder writes:
Forgive me if you're already aware of the phenomenon of Krabathor, a band from the Czech Republic whose lyrical content would make that of the early 90s British band Cancer seem highly intellectual.
Usually when a band uses english as a second language, there's a gradual learning curve and they end up getting it more right than wrong. Not Krabathor. Each release continues to defy the listener's/reader's ears/eyes with the pure nonsensical ramblilngs that is usually the exclusive purview of Japanese Wigger Slam bands. Check em out.
The Inquisitors respond:
I have heard Krabathor, but I didn't know that they were such an Engrish factory! I hopped on their MySpace and checked them, with hilarious results:
I'm irritate appearanceThanks for the tip!
In the eyes is death and revenge
In my face is grisly anger
Task is O.K. - killing the brain! <-- This was my favorite!
Don't control my wrath
In the veins is poison
Killing for my virtue
Slowly let out poisonous blood
Psychodelic
Every have own mistakes
I've defect in brain
Now we are in a row living
I'll kill, piece by piece
I'm loyal for death
I see only hopeless
People are the fuckers <-- Also a classic!!
Therefore kill, kill, kill!
Psychodelic
I kill the innocents,
But among they are the offenders
Death even so is just
I kill the others, don't will better
Do the Dew
Brian shares the following inspirational image. Keep it fuckin' sick, bro!! Guttural slamming brutality crew, Pepsi chapter!!
No frills metal humor
Mark is a man of few words, and write the following concise note:
I enjoy your blog, so here are some more photos to make fun of.
http://profile.myspace.com/
http://profile.myspace.com/
The Inquisitors respond:
Sure enough, there are some doozies in here!
For being so grim and necro, he looks remarkably relaxed, even pleasant. I'm trying to figure out what's going on with his flooring: is that weird carpet, or crappy linoleum tile that's coming up at the edges? Either way, I would take a look at it before it gets worse. If there's water damage, you want to catch that as soon as possible!
And here he is out of costume. It's not a bad little back yard, although with houses on either side, I think it might end up being a little too shady and cool for my tastes. You would really only get sun back there at high noon. It seems like it would be an ideal place to grow something that thrives in shade, though, like bluebells or maybe something in the nightshade family. I love bluebells, they're so pretty! Also, the shiny red ball. 
Oh come on, you're not even trying!! Back in my day, we at least got in the car and stood in front of the scariest building in town instead of just crudely photoshopping ourselves in front of something off of Google images. And what kind of a name is "Restless"? That's like using "Mildly Annoyed" or "Uncomfortable" as your black metal name!Until next time... keep the emails coming!
