Waking The Cadaver: When wigger slam goes TOO FAR

There's no time for love, just time for hate!!

You know what I love? Fucking Fury of V. Back in the mid 90s, when mesh shorts, Tommy Hilfiger tank tops, and visors were the order of the day, Fury fucking held it down. Nobody fucked with those guys!! And if they did, they caught a Jersey-style beatdown! Those were the days, my friends. But you know what I don't love? When Jersey shore wiggers play crappy slam metal. And that brings us to Waking The Cadaver, a budget wigger slam band from somewhere on the Jersey shore. There many things wrong with WTC, but you can boil it down to three main issue:

1. They are the wrong kind of wiggers
When Japanese people or Europeans try to be wiggers, it's cute. It's kind of a novelty, like dressing your cat up in a funny costume or women's sports. With chavs or that weird jumpstyle dancing, you can excuse it because they're Euros, which means that they might as well be infantile retards so you can't really hold it against them. The problem here is that WTC are real life, authentic American wiggers, and nobody wants more of those.

Big pants waste precious fabric
(I stole that line from some 90s punk comp)

2. They are popular with Myspace homos
Perhaps because of their hardcore origins, WTC became an interweb phenomenon among suburban 17 year olds with girl jeans and Myspace haircuts. The results? Well... you can see below- it's not pretty:

Like Job For A Cowboy, Despised Icon, and whatever other atrocious bands are playing this wretched style, this is reason enough to hate WTC.


Note the abundance of wiggerish arm movements at around :35

3. Absence of quality control
The fact that there is a wigger slam band that I do not like should be the first sign of trouble. As MI readers know, my standards for slam metal are not exactly high. For example, I love Artery Eruption, although when I played them for Lucho Metales, he said "Dude... come on. We could do that in my garage in like 45 minutes." And he was right. Yet WTC is below even my laughably low standards for wigger slam metal.

Let's begin with the name of their album: "Perverse Recollections Of A Necromangler." Necromangler?? Again, if they were Japs or Euros, it would be fine (for example, Blunt Force Trauma's song "Fight In Anus" is great). But they don't have ESL as an excuse.

Cypress Hill sticker on guitar = not OK

The lyrics are pretty much what you would expect from the Einsteins that invented the word "Necromangler":

Countless nights getting twisted
extreme illicit substance inhalation.
Fuck...I'm craving some penetration
because hoes, let me tell you,
i do it unprotected like its my occupation,
and guaranteed
your puckering up your lips for a spraying.

Now keep in mind I am a huge Meatshits fan, so it's not like I am particularly demanding or looking for anything intellectual. But this is on another level of subhuman stupidity, something like what you would expect from Insane Clown Posse. For example, I think this verse from "What Is A Juggalo?" could be WTC lyrics:

What is a Juggalo?
He just dont care.
He might try to put a weave in his nut hair.
Cuz he could give a fuck less what a bitch thinks,
He tell her that her butt stinks, and all that.

WTC or random shitty hardcore band on Back Ta Basics? You be the judge.

As for their songwriting skills, rather than think of something witty myself, I will plagiarize some review from Encyclopedia Metallum instead:

I'm serious, the only riffs on the album are so mindlessly simplistic, the arbitrary blastbeats are the only thing that seperates them from being breakdowns themselves! If that's not enough, the only thing more "brootal" than the breakdowns is the breakdowns WITHIN the breakdowns. And the meta-breakdowns. And the resulting breakdowns whenever the band decides to cool off after "breaking it down".

Meta-breakdowns!! That is what we call solid gold.

NEW YORKMENT keep it fuckin slam

I have never been in a band, but if I was going to start one, it would be exactly like my new favorite up and coming wigger slam band, NEW YORKMENT. With song titles like "Pit Riffment," "Slam the Gorebong," and "Ingorging Ingorgity," I knew I would love them before I heard the first note. Thanks to Matt from NJ's finest, Kalopsia, for the tip!


Instead of trying to describe them myself, I will use the words of one of their fans instead:

"Yo fuck tha haters. NEW YORKMENT is da real deal. Serious broz, serious music. East Coast new wave of death slam in full effect. NEW YORKMENT, WITHOUT REMORSE, REVENANCE" - Chrissy Wormgutzz

Be sure to check them out on Myspace because I hear they are working on setting up some shows with a bunch of sick bands like Deregorged Necrogorger, Cumtopsy and Ungorge Ingorgity of Ingorgement (sorry, they're too underground for Myspace but I am sure you'll be hearing more about them soon!).

I also agree with their feelings on crappy old bands like Carcass, Repulsion and Iron Maiden. It is refreshing to hear someone tell it like it is. As far as I am concerned, Repulsion and Terrorizer are about as brutal as Fleetwood Mac or Wings, and if you think they are the pinnacle of death metal, you are probably old enough to get the AARP discount on the salad bar at Rax. I am much more interested in guttural slamming brutality like Cemetery Rapist, Malignant Rupture and NJDOTS and cutting edge labels like Fuck The Ass Records that are pushing the envelope with bands like New Yorkment. Crappy old school fossil rockers like Morbid Angel wouldn't know a gravity blast or bass drop if it slammed their ass across the pit.

NO PUSSY ASSED OLDSCHOOL BULLSHIT!! FUCK OLD METAL IRON MAIDEN N MOTERHEAD IS UNBRUTAL SHITTY DINOSAUR METAL!!!!!

If the words of their fans aren't enough to convince you, maybe this testimonial from legendary Japanese wigger slammers Vomit Remnants will persuade you:

""me likey likey. good slammin NYDM shit! i'm glad my boys in dying fetus told me to check this band out!" -Keisuke from Vomit Remnants

NECROTIC ENBLUGEONER, AND MORE PIT CRUSHING SLAMNESS!!!!!

Everything you need to know about WIGGER SLAM METAL

We talk about wigger slam metal a lot here on Metal Inquisition, but there is still a lot of confusion as to what exactly the genre means. In this post, I will attempt to explain the basics. Unlike a lot of what we write about on here, I take wigger slam metal very seriously and I honestly love this stuff.

What's wigger slam?
Slam metal is just death metal that focuses on the mosh parts instead of the thrash parts. It's very straightforward. They key elements are a very ringy snare, guttural cricket vocals, and of course tons of slam riffs. Wigger slam metal is simple slam metal played by wiggers. And there is no shortage of this stuff, as you will see.

The early years: Long Island guido slam metal
In the beginning, there was Internal Bleeding. And before that, there was Pyrexia and Suffocation. But it wasn't until Internal Bleeding that the guido and wigger elements crept into the slam sound. They had lots of slam riffs and acted like tough guys. It makes a lot of sense when you think about how stupid people from Long Island are.

Waking The Cadaver: Jersey Shore slamming sickness!!

Then you had bands like Repudilation and Entorturement that took it to the next level of wiggerdom by actually rapping over slam riffs. It was equal parts totally ridiculous and totally fucking awesome. I still listen to the Repudilation demo all the time. Rounding out this scene were bands like Dehumanized and Disfigured that slammed like crazy but lacked the wigger overtones. They're still worth listening to, though, even though you'll miss the wig.

The next generation: Devourment and Texas slam metal
However, it was really Devourment that created the genre we know today as wigger slam metal (although they were mostly Mexicans... but whatever). They introduced some of the common elements such as TR-808 bass drops, gravity blasts, and post-Internal Bleeding cricket vocals. I mean Frank Rini had some deep-ass vocals but in a totally different way from Devourment. Most wigger slam bands these days are essentially just refining the Devourment formula, ever so slightly improving on it every time. It's almost as though Devourment was put through the Toyota kaizen process a thousand times, getting a little more refined each time. I think Jack Welch would be proud. Other notable bands of this generation include Sect of Execration, Prophecy (keepin' it fuckin sick!), and a zillion other bands I can't think of right now. Viral Load or something I guess.

Japanese wigger slam metallers Vomit Remnants

The new wave: Wigger slam goes international
New school wigger slam metal just might be my favorite kind of music in the whole world. These days most of the wigger slam metal happens in places like Russia, Japan, and Scandanavia. I think this is because their malformed third world minds don't quite understand how absurd and uniquely American it is to wear camo shorts, basketball jerseys and play slam riffs with cricket vocals. But whatever, because those Japanese really know how to fuckin slam, I'll tell you what. The Russians are developing a really distinctive style as well. But the Americans are still holding it down. You definitely need to check out Cephalotripsy- they sound just like Voracious Contempt but with even more machine-like slams, an even ringier snare sound, and even deeper vocals.

Yes, they even have wiggers in Sweden

America/Canada
Cephalotripsy (probably the very best wigger slam band ever)
Guttural Secrete
Waking The Cadaver
Orchidectomy

Japan
Vomit Remnants
Glossectomy
Rest In Gore
Disconformity

Check out the cornrows on the left and how the bassist is playing like Fieldy from Korn (this is Rest In Gore)

Russia & Scandanavia
Katalepsy
Abominable Putridity
Soils of Fate

Please visit the Guttural Slamming Brutality Crew

Here is a song by Rest In Gore that's maybe the very best example of the latest wigger slam stylings from Japan.



And here is a video by the Japanese wigger slam metal band Glossectomy. Please note the MC Hammer-like beanies and wiggerish arm movements.



Budget Wigger Slam
There is a small but important sub-genre of combines the lo-fi production and sloppiness of grindcore with the traditional wigger slam style. We call this budget wigger slam, and it is typically found in the wilds of MySpace. There are zillions of these bands, and like noisecore, you either like all of them or none of them. I like lots of these bands, with Artery Eruption and Grymer being excellent examples. But fucking Malignant Rupture are the kings of budget wigger slam! They're like 15 years old and slam like there is no tomorrow. I hope they put out a demo or something, I can't stop listening to their MySpace song.

I wish I could slam like this slam wiglet from Malignant Rupture when I was in 10th grade

Big Chocolate
This 17 year old kid, who goes by Big Chocolate on the interweb, really deserves his own entry in the annals of slam history. In my opinion he is the finest wigger slam metal musician in the history of the genre, and I'm not even fucking kidding a tiny bit. I'm totally on this kid's balls. He is in the bands Disfiguring the Goddess and Malodorous. Please note his Wu-Tang shirt.

Metal Inquisition History Lesson: I Was In The Wild Rags Street Team

Here at Metal Inquisition, our primary goal is to entertain. Another, perhaps secondary goal, is to school today's metal youth in metal history. It's with that spirit in mind that this post was written. School is in suckas.




This seemingly unassuming corner in Montebello California was once upon a time the home of Wild Rags Records, the record label and store run by the infamous Richard C (full name Ricardo Campos). Richard C is without a doubt one of the more polarizing names you can bring up to those who were involved in the underground metal scene in the early 1990's. Widely known as "rip-off" (a now seldom used term common in the days before the internet when tape trading occurred strictly through the mail) Richard and his label continue to be the topic of conversation on the internet, even though the label has not existed in some time, and the man himself has long ago fallen off the face of the earth. A Myspace tribute page is out there, but very little else remains of the once infamous label. Makes you wonder who on earth would even take a minute out of their time to keep the memory of the label who put out records by Zombified Preachers Of Gore alive...but anyway. I keep using the word "infamous" when referring to the man and his label, because I don't know what else to call the label and the bands they put out. "Laughable" could also work I guess...but then again I have the entire Nuclear Death discography on my Ipod...so I can't make fun of the label all that much.

Though Wild Rags started out releasing questionable music (including glam bands like Cherry Street), the label would go on to put out influential releases by the likes of Nuclear Death, Impetigo, Brutality, Blood, Bloodcum, Sigh, as well as Emperor and Internal Bleeding. I also remember them distributing demos by bands like Excrutiating Terror before they became the darlings of the powerviolence scene. Back to Internal Bleeding though...as I write this I have to laugh because I remember having Internal Bleeding's first demo, and thinking to myself "man, they signed to Wild Rags? They're gonna be huge!" Such a thing would only be funny to someone like me, who had the first Internal Bleeding demo back when it first came out. Old timer metal humor I guess.

My limited interaction with Richard C began after I went to a Morbid Angel show in 1991 or so, and received a flyer that talked about how much of a rip off Wild Rags was. Since I was planning on ordering the Impetigo "Faceless" EP that week, I included the flyer along with my order, and asked for his thoughts on the matter. The response I got from Richard was unexpected to say the least. Along with the EP, I got a large box with tons of records, CDs, stickers, tapes and about 50 copies of his publication The Wild Rag. The letter that came along with all this stuff explained how the guy that made the flyer was full of crap, and that he'd appreciate it if I would pass out his flyers, records and magazines at the same shows where the anti-Wild Rags flyers were being passed out. I quickly decided that the last thing I wanted was to get into a confrontation with some stranger at a show regarding a guy in California I had never met. So, I decided to sell the copies of the magazine to fellow metalheads in school (for a buck each) keep the records I liked, and sell the rest at a local record store. For a couple of years the boxes kept coming, and I had a steady supply of free gore and grind records, as well as a few bucks in my pocket. This all seems like ancient history now, but at the time I have to admit that I felt pretty cool being somehow connected to a somewhat legitimate record label. I remember telling kids in school that I was the local rep. for a label, or something like that. Even thinking of it now I cringe...but such is life.

I actually met Richard at the Milwakee Metal Fest one year without even knowing it. I approached him to buy a shirt in the parking lot to the venue, and noticing that he only had Wild Rags merchandise, I asked him if he was Richard. He quickly said "no, I don't know that guy". Later it became clear that it was him, but he didn't really want anyone to know who he was. I'm sure he wanted to avoid getting his face punched in by all the people he had supposedly ripped off...but the allure of thousands of metal fans eager to spend their money on his records and badly screened shirts had made him fly all the way to Milwaukee. Little did I know that angry guys in bands were the least of his problems. More on that in a minute.


After a few years, the packages of free stuff dried up. His zine The Wild Rag became even worse and more laughable than it had been before, and I lost interest. I had completely forgotten about the label and Richard, until fellow metal brother Sergeant D brought up the subject to me about six years ago. I began to tell him about my interaction with Richard C, and as I told him the story I thought to myself "Holy crap, I was in the Wild Rags street team before street teams existed!"

Out of all the stories and accounts of whatever happened to Richard, the only one I seem to think is truthful comes from Pat who played in Hellwitch. I used to trade metal videos with Pat around 1990-1992 and wrote with him a lot. He always struck me as being a nice and upfront guy (he also had unbelievable penmanship by the way, all in cursive...not very metal). In this interview from 2006 he said:

..Ricardo was charged by the U.S. government with crime of income tax evasion and was sent to prison!! Actually, I’m not sure if he was caught, but I know he was wanted for this crime. Some say he fled to his home country of Mexico. The members of Sadistic Intent went to the government auction of Wild Rags’ stock and purchased most of it. They now run a record store in L.A. called Dark Realm, which sells much of Ricardo’s confiscated inventory! Haha! I love telling this story! As we say in America, “What comes around, goes around!”. Ricardo got his!

Okay, now that I have this story out of my system...I promise I'll try to make my future posts funny.

Internal Bleeding: We have some tapes for sale, some fuckin' hats.

As the inventors of wigger slam metal,* I love Internal Bleeding with every fiber of my being. But it's not just their music that I like, because wigger slam metal isn't just a genre of music, it's a way of life. It's the words you use, the friends you choose, the way you walk down the street like a fucking hardass because you're listening to Dying Fetus on your cassette Walkman and you feel invincible, it's in every fucking beat of your heart.

Anyway, here is a vintage clip of Internal Bleeding from 1994. If you weren't around back then, you might not know what it was like to be part of the emerging wigger slam scene. You might want to pay close attention to Frank Rini's stage banter because it might as well be the blueprint for what it means to be a slam wigger.

"Thanks a lot for hangin' around, man. Cool fuckin' shit. This is a fuckin' new song. We have some tapes for sale, some fuckin' hats. You fuckers. Fuckin' we're all here to have a good fuckin' time so let's tear this fuckin' place up."



* You can't really credit Suffocation with inventing wigger slam because they actually had black people in the band- I know Internal Bleeding did too but it doesn't really count since he was only on the demo