Breaking through the myths: The facts about wigger slam

As I am prone to do every so often, I googled for "wigger slam" this afternoon. I was thrilled to see quite a few results, but it was clear that many people don't understand the genre. 

Please begin by reading my post from back in March, "Everything You Need To Know About Wigger Slam." Many people missed it because we didn't have as many readers then, but it's still a good place to start! Then, read all our other posts on wigger slam.

We ain't playing, son.

Apparently some people think that I am being ironic when I sing the praises of wigger slam. From Metal Sucks:

Reading all those Wigger Slam posts at Metal Inquisition usually makes me piss myself with laughter. I actually cannot tell if the posts are meant to be sarcastic, or if they really do like that music.

First of all, you must know that I am not joking even a teeny tiny bit about how much I love slam metal, especially wigger slam, and especially Japanese wigger slam. This shit is in my blood. While I'm at work, where I do things like market research for Pampers, Swiffer, and Febreze, I'm jamming Infernal Revulsion. When I'm at the gym, blasting my quads, you better fucking believe I've got Gorevent on my pink iPod Nano. I could go on forever. The point is that you are a poser that only thinks about wigger slam when you read Metal Inquisition, it's just a novelty to you. Wigger slam is a WAY OF LIFE for me.

Wigger slam is NOT deathcore

The next thing you need to understand is that these two genres are not the same thing, or even slightly related. For example, in the above Metal Sucks post, you can see that many people are confused (although some people in the comments do get it):

I can’t say as I get what all the hubbub is about — to these ears, wigger slam is basically just another, less cringe-inducing name for a genre we’ve all grown to hate — deathcore — with an occasional nu-metal influence — as if this is supposed to be a good thing.

To be fair, I can understand the confusion. Wait, actually I can't, they are completely different and I have no idea how they could get mixed up. I will be very explicit here so that there is no more room for stupidity:

People in deathcore bands look like this gaylord. If you photographed someone that was standing in the center of a Hot Topic when a bomb went off, it would look like the image above.

Deathcore = "Scene kids" playing shitty metalcore with blast beats and weak death metal-influenced breakdowns that aren't even good enough to be out-takes from a Green Rage or Extinction (click the link for funny pictures of Pete Wentz with dreads when he played in this horrible band) 7". Examples: Job For A Cowboy, Despised Icon, other wretched garbage they play on Headbanger's Ball all the time. Often they will mix in gay shit like singing or high-pitched screams in with their weak imitation of death metal vocals. They do not generally do guttural cricket vocals.

People in wigger slam bands look like this. If you are thinking that they look like the guy that comes to fix your air conditioning unit at work, it's because they probably are that guy.

Wigger slam = White trash dudes without two brain cells to rub together playing awesome, brutal death metal that is one Devourment-inspired slam riff after the next. The difference is that they often incorporate hip-hop references in their lyrics and the way they dress. This might seem strange, because we don't usually think of rap and brutal death metal as two things that go together. But it is actually very simple to explain: people who grow up as poor white trash (such as me) often listened to equal amounts of Eazy-E, Pantera, and Napalm Death. It is easy to see that combining those three is the formula for wigger slam. 

Wigger slam is also very popular with foreigners who don't understand how absurd it is to emulate this very American style. They have no idea how hilarious it is to see little Asian guys or dumb Swedes act like Long Island and Jersey shore trash. As Lucho Metales says, it's a little bit like watching Civil War reenactments. Although it's never not funny to watch their silly attempts at sounding tough, the Japanese are the masters of wigger slam.

Examples of wigger slam: Gorevent, Rest In Gore, Glossectomy, Dysentery, New Yorkment

(on another note, it's funny to see how upset the guy from Short Bus Pile Up is that I called his band wigger slam instead of just slam- and don't get wigger slam mixed up with cornfield slam!)

I hope that covers everything. In conclusion, please watch the above Devourment video. They aren't wigger slam, but as many readers already know, they are the pioneers of slam metal, and this video is a particularly good representation of them (featuring their original singer Wayne, who is now dead).

Also watch this Glossectomy video, particularly the very unusual dancing at around :33! I think it captures the silliness of Japanese wigger slam very well.