Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Evil D Arrested in Italy

A candid shot of Evil D and his prison bitch, Alessandro.

If you've ever been to Italy, then you know that Italians do not fuck around when it comes to airport security. They may not be able to win a war or protect their borders, but you cannot fuck with an Italian airport. There's carabinieri all over the place casually packing fully automatic firearms and I cannot tell you how many times I've had my luggage ransacked for no reason other than to make my life miserable.  It's no surprise then to find out that one of our favorite 90s death metal retards, David Vincent AKA Evil D, was arrested and charged with a weapons offence for carrying a bullet belt (Thanks to our loyal reader Jason for the tip). You can read the full Metal Hammer article about the incident here. Having personally spent many hours in Italian airports I cannot tell you how amusing I find this whole incident. I can totally picture airport security pulling the bullet belt out of Evil D's luggage, inspecting it, looking at each other, him pleading with them that it's not made of real bullets, then them whispering something to each other and within seconds 15-20 carabinieri swarming Evil D and escorting him to a holding cell. I'm not surprised that they questioned him for two and a half hours. When it comes to matters of airport security, Italians like to be thorough. When asked for a comment on the situation Evil D responded in his characteristic dickhead manner. "For 20 years I've had my same friendly bullet belt with me at all metal occasions. After 20 years of being a lawless individual, I'm happy that the Keystone Kops of spaghetti western fame have been able to show me the error of my ways." I'm sure it's that kind of attitude that got him into this fine mess in the first place. He's lucky the Italians are such understanding, forgiving people. In foreign countries around the world people have been brought before firing squads for much less!



Evil D going over the lyrics to a new song entitled "Eradication of the Etruscans."

13 comments:

  1. i see that the italians heard he's been working with soulfly.

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  2. My favorite part is how he says he's always had the belt "at all metal occasions". What exactly makes for a "metal occasion", anyway? Does he really not break it out if he deems the occasion "not metal enough"? I mean, sure, those belts are fucking props anyway, but... it's just funny to hear someone actually refer to it like that.

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  3. have you read the article on blabbermouth about "the genitorturers frontwoman issues a statement"

    the article not once mentions that shes his wife and she goes on to describe being stopped for a belt buckle in the shape of a guy.

    I'm sorry but when your wife issues a statement defending you while pretending to not be your wife to not make you feel like less of a man, thats pretty sad...

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  4. i meant in the shape of a gun....

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  5. I'd like to leave Italy and take refuge in Switzerland...we are a ridiculous nation, our politicians fuck soubrettes and cost us a shitload of €, and we receive all sorts of low life from outside our borders because everybody knows that here you can robe, rape and kill and be out of jail in a few weeks...

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  6. This is the same country that elected a Czech porn-slut to parliament, right? Okay, just checking.

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  7. Yup. "Ilona for president" was a song by Bulldozer.
    But she was from Hungary, I think...

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  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  9. in light of that naples garbage grotesque, glad to see someone's taking out the trash.

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  10. "Lawless individual" = massive LOL's. The dude in WASP should sue for infringement.

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  11. your fucking web address has too many i's in it to type when youre drunk

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  12. In the beginning pearl hunting was the only means known for harvesting pearls. A little before the start of the 20th century divers manually pulled oysters from ocean floors and river bottoms and checked each one of them individually for pearls.

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