Friday, March 7, 2008

Darkthrone were better when they sounded like early Gorguts


It is well known that I don't like black metal, with the exception of early USBM bands like Havohej, Profanatica, and Von. As far as I am concerned, black metal is for beard metallers and weirdo Scandanavians. And don't even get me started on Hydra Head.

That's why Darkthrone is such a tragedy. Their first album, "Soulside Journey", is a masterpiece of generic, early 90s technical death metal. More than anything else, it reminds me of the first Gorguts album, "Considered Dead." I know all you beard metallers prefer the later Gorguts material where they sound like Dillinger Escape Plan and Human Remains, and that's how I know you're all posers.

Why would a band record an excellent Gorguts/Dismember tribute album like "Soulside Journey" then ruin their reputation by writing "Transylvanian Hunger"? That sounds like a song from the Castlevania: Symphony of the Night soundtrack (which, by the way, is excellent). Which is fine, but it certainly isn't metal.

If you want to confess to us that you are a poser, just leave a comment in which you defend "Transylvanian Hunger" or black metal in general.

22 comments:

  1. 4 first DT LP are masterpieces. Period.

    ReplyDelete
  2. this is the most controversial thing that has ever been said in the world of metal. watch the black metal fans storm the castle.

    ReplyDelete
  3. when people ask me why i say such controversial things, i tell them "i'm the kind of person that just says what i think, and if you can't handle it, that's YOUR problem! i'm too REAL for you!!"

    ReplyDelete
  4. Me = poser. This is a decent album, as is that other one they recorded in this vein but didn't release until years after the fact (What was it, "Goatlord" or whatever?), but... still kinda boring. I definitely prefer the black metal stuff.

    But really I just prefer watching video interviews of Fenriz singing along to A.O.D. and talking about Michael Jackson and random shit like that. The dude is a fucking god among men.

    ReplyDelete
  5. as much as i love this album and early gorguts i have to admit that i'm also a big fan of darkthrone's black metal stuff.

    me = p0seur

    ReplyDelete
  6. I don't care much for any period of Dark Throne, but don't get my clean-shaven chin started on Gorguts' "Obscura" album. As visionary as certain records by Voivod and Cynic. I'm sticking my tongue at you right now.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hey, way to big up the Symphony Of The Night soundtrack, that shit slays! I knew I liked you guys!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I don't see how one can love Death Metal and hate Black Metal. It's all rooted in Venom, Celtic Frost, Bathory, Slayer, Kreator, Voivod and etc...

    ReplyDelete
  9. It's all rooted in Venom, Celtic Frost, Bathory, Slayer, Kreator, Voivod

    but those bands are all terrible

    ReplyDelete
  10. the sergeant is TOO real. you do, in fact, speak your mind...and that's why you're such a crucial part of this operation. if only Borivoj Krign had been this real when doing demo reviews in Metal Maniacs in 1993...

    ReplyDelete
  11. People have been saying this for a long time, it's nothing new (or surprising,) really. I'll agree Dartkthrone took a strange and unpredictible step towards mediocrity at one point in their carreer, but this was not until after Total death in 1996.

    I've argued for years (at least since about '97 or so, which being eleven fucking years can certainly be regarded as, well, years) that the prime suspect in the entire Darkthrone catalog is Goatlord, which outshines everything else they ever did in terms of vision, scope, musicianship, songwriting and classicalitude. Compared to just about anything that was around at the time ('90/'91) it stands like a phallic pillar of absolutely fucking impenetrable genious, if I'm ever going to use that ridiculous word about a piece of music.

    I could whine about this forever. Incidentally, Obscura (which I'm really glad does not sound like Dillinger escape plan or Human remains (which I never really saw the appeal of)) is one of the greatest albums of all time.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Saying that Venom, Celtic Frost, Bathory, Slayer, Kreator, Voivod are all terrible bands on METAL INQUISITION seems like an oxymoron.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I'm more confused by how dude supposedly talks about death metal and black metal, then names six thrash bands. What?

    (Yes, Bathory were a thrash metal band, even on the single only worthwile album they ever managed to concoct (which is Requiem since you asked.))

    ReplyDelete
  14. Darkthrone suckz

    ReplyDelete
  15. How is Bathory thrash? Are we talking about the stuff at the beginning of their career that has the classic hallmarks of early black metal, or the later stuff where they're playing at half speed and singing about Vikings?

    ReplyDelete
  16. older by the minuteApril 21, 2008 at 5:02 PM

    Hallmarks of boring thrash.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Bathory was sloppy thrash trying to be played very fast but failed miserably. Just like Sarcofago. Then again, in the 80's, too fast wasn't capable of being played yet...
    Love all Gorguts!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  18. im going to lay my virgin arse on the line and say goatlord is my favourite darkthrone album. gotta love the fact it sucks so much its incredible.

    ReplyDelete
  19. darkthrone was better before fenriz got that stupid dogbert tattoo

    ReplyDelete
  20. This could have the MOST MORONIC bunch of posts on any thread I have ever seen. The "Sarg" could be numbest moron ever to "talk" metal. You are not real, other than TRYING REALLY HARD to be provocative with your comments. That is not being real. That is being a TROLL. The only morons that debate "genres" are the people who were not there at the beginning of all this-WAY before the net, WAY before FM radio played anything remotely heavy (other than the occasional late night weekend metal show, which was usually your local college radio station).
    Back in the day when even Metallica had a year or so being labeled "Death Metal".
    Shut up, and if do not like BM, DM, thrash or whatever, you have other forms heaviness to choose from. But tools like Sarge who think by being an uneducated music ass is being "bold"-try again.

    ReplyDelete
  21. This could have the MOST MORONIC bunch of posts on any thread I have ever seen. The "Sarg" could be numbest moron ever to "talk" metal. You are not real, other than TRYING REALLY HARD to be provocative with your comments. That is not being real. That is being a TROLL. The only morons that debate "genres" are the people who were not there at the beginning of all this-WAY before the net, WAY before FM radio played anything remotely heavy (other than the occasional late night weekend metal show, which was usually your local college radio station).
    Back in the day when even Metallica had a year or so being labeled "Death Metal".
    Shut up, and if do not like BM, DM, thrash or whatever, you have other forms heaviness to choose from. But tools like Sarge who think by being an uneducated music ass is being "bold"-try again.

    ReplyDelete
  22. I don't know who posted this, but I totally think he nailed it. Black Metal is gay as fuck, I am not talking about mercyful fate, possessed, early slayer, etc etc type of bands of course, but those gay bands from Norway and whatever that started to use Donald duck vocals corpse paint etc. Darkthrone was a good band during their death metal years, and then like true posers , saw things were changing and so they did change to conform to the new trend of the early to mid 90s, black metal the gay way.

    ReplyDelete