Monday, February 4, 2008

Dude, it cost like $30 bucks to do. Respect it.

Could you imagine loving a record so much that every time you went to your bedroom to riff really, really hard you wanted to remind yourself of why?

I can’t.

But, I am old. Probably older than the dude that paid to have this done. At least I hope so. I have been wrong before.

Honestly, this guitar has me embarrassed. I love Obituary but right now I have that empathetic embarrassment that is reserved for when you see a retarded kid trip and bust open his lip on the sidewalk. Sure, you laugh, but you feel bad for laughing, because you are so close to being that retarded kid its scary.


  1. fuck dude, i love obituary, and i love that guitar! why would i be embarrassed to play it?! it's got the fuckin dead fish eye from The End Complete on it!! now if it had the retarded cover of Slowly We Rot, it might be a problem...

  2. dude what the fuck that is an HP LOVECRAFT guitar!!! It's fucking awesome!!!!!

    You need to recognize

  3. oh i know it is hp lovecraft. but how much is retarded worth?

  4. Ahhh, come on, when I was 15 or 16 I would have flipped out to have had damn near any metally lookin' Michael Whelan graphics on a guitar like that. I'd probably feel stupid about it NOW, but... everyone would have worshiped you in 1993.

  5. I'll bet the kid that had this guitar made is a lot less annoying than the bitter asshead that wrote this lame shit. If you get so old that any sign of enthusiasm seems cheesy to you, then it might be time to go ahead and admit that you're into jazz and "Dwell" magazine. Embrace your boring middle age existence and maybe give a little thought to suicide. I'd rather own this guitar than then set of golf clubs your ex-wife got you for Christmas.